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The store clerks will call you "Sweetie" and "Hon." It would be a mistake to act on this, dear.
"Right of way"? You make me laugh, Visitor-Boy.
Sure, it's a little bit of trouble to get a prison pass allowing you to visit the maximum security institutions, but that's where you can learn Oklahoma political history firsthand, from those who were actually involved in it.
Enjoy our fried sushi!
Bring plenty of spare change. Plan to stop every 15 minutes & and pay road tolls. Thanks for building our infrastructure, nickel and dime at a time.
If you tour Muskogee, you can view the USS Batfish, which still stands as a solemn warning to all who would invade Oklahoma by sea.
Buy all the liquor you want . . . but there's a limit on Sudafed, and you'll need I.D.
It's okay to use the pot holes after a heavy rain to play with your radio-controlled boats. It is not okay to use full-sized watercraft.
Oklahoma's state slogan is "Work Conquers All." It is enforced through our worker's compensation system.
At most restaurants, you will need to formally opt out of gravy. You might get gravy anyway. Do not despair. Beneath it lurks an unknowable fried meat.
Tornado sirens are signals to go outside and look up at the sky.
If you can eat it, then it's sold "on a stick" at the State Fair.
Yes, that is Abraham Lincoln in the Cowboy Hall of Fame.
If you want to drive here, please activate your turn signal first. Thank you. Don't forget to turn it off when you leave Oklahoma.
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