10. Secretary won't type anything for her without first seeing a photo I.D.
9. His law library? Two John Grisham novels.
8. "Tort case? Sure, bring it in! And I'd like a cup of coffee with that, please."
7. His "admission to the bar" ended with a taxi ride home.
8. Uses his own Hot Wheels collection to reconstruct the accident.
5. The jury didn't notice she was chewing gum in court -- but then she started blowing bubbles.
4. Pleads with the jury for a chance to pay his last months' rent.
3. Ran out of material in his oral argument to the Court -- used up the rest of his time with card tricks.
2. Giggles every time he says the words "briefs."
And the Number One Sign Your Lawyer is Inexperienced:
1. Her entire closing argument: "That is sooooo not true!"
